Love is used to treat seizures: real seizures, fake seizures not really brought on by the Holy Spirit, real seizures actually brought on by the Holy Spirit, and real seizures brought on by something else, something not holy at all, something red and hot as a rash.
Before administering love, tell someone, anyone if you are allergic to love or any ingredient in love. Tell this person, this maker of apple pancakes or this painter of heroes wrapped in thorns, if you have any reactions that are red. If you have shortness of breath, heart palpitations, sweaty hands, swelling of any body part, if you have tears, if you have the urge to write a poem so hard the pen breaks and leaks ink all over your jeans. Tell the hero wrapped in thorns, but don’t expect Him to listen. He is part of the reason for your seizures. He is the reason for the symptom and the cure. Tell Him if you have kidney disease. Tell Him about any and all problems that may interact with love. Do not start, stop, or change the dose of love without checking with Him.
Use love as ordered by the Holy Spirit. Or the red thing. Take with or without food. Swallow whole. Do not chew, break or crush. Crushes are for girls. Check with the Holy Spirit to see if it is safe for you to love with all your drugs and other love problems. Drink lots of noncaffeine liquids but avoid Strawberry Hill Boones Farm because it is disgusting. If you need to stop love, you will want to stop very slowly.
Protect love from light. Keep love in a dry place. Do not take two doses of love at a time. Do not take two doses of love at a time. Do not take two doses of love at a time.
Author Bio:
Ann Stewart McBee was born in Kalamazoo, Michigan. She obtained her PhD in creative writing at the University of Wisconsin–Milwaukee. She has published fiction and poetry in Ellipsis, Untamed Ink, The Pinch, and Citron Review among others. Her short story collection titled How Rabbit Went Down and other Mishaps is available from Hoot-n-Waddle press. She now teaches English at Des Moines Area Community College, and lives outside Des Moines, Iowa. The limited use of her hands due to Rheumatoid Arthritis does not prevent her from writing in the same way that living in heavy air pollution does not prevent one from breathing.
Before administering love, tell someone, anyone if you are allergic to love or any ingredient in love. Tell this person, this maker of apple pancakes or this painter of heroes wrapped in thorns, if you have any reactions that are red. If you have shortness of breath, heart palpitations, sweaty hands, swelling of any body part, if you have tears, if you have the urge to write a poem so hard the pen breaks and leaks ink all over your jeans. Tell the hero wrapped in thorns, but don’t expect Him to listen. He is part of the reason for your seizures. He is the reason for the symptom and the cure. Tell Him if you have kidney disease. Tell Him about any and all problems that may interact with love. Do not start, stop, or change the dose of love without checking with Him.
Use love as ordered by the Holy Spirit. Or the red thing. Take with or without food. Swallow whole. Do not chew, break or crush. Crushes are for girls. Check with the Holy Spirit to see if it is safe for you to love with all your drugs and other love problems. Drink lots of noncaffeine liquids but avoid Strawberry Hill Boones Farm because it is disgusting. If you need to stop love, you will want to stop very slowly.
Protect love from light. Keep love in a dry place. Do not take two doses of love at a time. Do not take two doses of love at a time. Do not take two doses of love at a time.
Author Bio:
Ann Stewart McBee was born in Kalamazoo, Michigan. She obtained her PhD in creative writing at the University of Wisconsin–Milwaukee. She has published fiction and poetry in Ellipsis, Untamed Ink, The Pinch, and Citron Review among others. Her short story collection titled How Rabbit Went Down and other Mishaps is available from Hoot-n-Waddle press. She now teaches English at Des Moines Area Community College, and lives outside Des Moines, Iowa. The limited use of her hands due to Rheumatoid Arthritis does not prevent her from writing in the same way that living in heavy air pollution does not prevent one from breathing.
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