​Certitude~ By Bill DeArmond

     One student angrily thrust his hand in the air: “I am a Yugoist. My parents are Yugoists. So were their parents. This is my truth and I resent you asking me to challenge those beliefs.”

     And the Teacher scratched his expanding stomach and asked: “Tell me, Rush, do you have a car?”
    This set the student back a bit, but his anger was still in his reply: “Damn straight. I got a ’97 Dodge Stratus.”
            “You buy the 4- or 6-cylinder?”
            “Six. The fours tend to blow the head gaskets.”
            “How did you find it?”
            “What’d’ya mean?”
            “Did you buy the first car you saw?”
            “No. I checked out a dozen other cars before I bought it. I went on the Internet
       and looked at the safety ratings. Checked Consumer Reports and Kelley’s.”
            “What kind of car do your parents own?”
            “A 1995 Chevy Malibu.”
            “So you own a different model than your parents?”
            “Yep.”
            “Then don’t you think you should choose your religion as carefully as you did your car?”

Author Bio:
Dr. Bill DeArmond is Professor of Mass Communication and Film at Southwestern College in Winfield, Kansas. This month he has the lead story in Diodati #3 (available from Amazon) and a poem in the premiere issue of Tiny Tim's Literary Review.